Yes they really are.
Now, before the detailed vivisection of what passes for a mind of a Pagan takes place below, as a regular Kurganing does, let me first elucidate the ways in which supposed “Pagans” are a complete, joke, a fraud and basically the philosophical equivalent of a stoned out homeless guy shouting at clouds about the impending apocalypse.
I’ll bullet-point it for brevity:
- They don’t actually believe it. It’s a LARP couched in “we need to do this to win” or “we need to avoid anything to do with the Jooos (which is not wrong per se, but their attitude is akin to saying well, the Jews (say) invented math or the alphabet, so now I’ll stay illiterate! That will show them!) They are basically like a little kid that says he will now hold his breath until he dies. Well… NO ONE dies for their true honest belief in Odin or Freya. And no one ever will. You may as well believe someone TRULY BELIEVES in Mickey Mouse as their God.
- They are completely historically illiterate. They got their whole “belief system” by internet memes and watching Vikings on Netflix. They actually have ZERO historical accuracy or knowledge.
- They “believe” this makes them “tough”. And it has essentially the same “toughness” of emo kids and the 80’s punks with gelled mohicans.
- They really are not even midwit level IQ. These are basically frustrated normies. They are the religious equivalent of MGTOW incels.
And now the main event, which was prompted by me commenting on some worshipper of Nietzsche, thusly:
Which prompted various mouth-breathing retards to drool on their keyboard thusly:
And he rejoined with this:
So here is the article he wrote, in full, and the evisceration that follows is brought to you by the latest research tool that is quite useful at providing details that would have been time consuming before.
Assessment of a Neo‑Pagan “Reconquest” Argument
Claim‑by‑claim historical evaluation
The Text Under Examination
The following argument was submitted for evaluation. It is reproduced in full before analysis.
If Western Civilization is to thrive and flourish once again Westermen need to reconquer the traditional Western church and return it to the gods of our ancestors. Worship of a foreign god has never ended well for any civilization. In fact, it has always been used to enslave. However, the church that the West has created is now one of the cornerstones of modern Western Civilization and therefore should be taken back, or reconquered, for the benefit of our future. It’s good for a civilized community to share common values, principles, and customs, and to hear their leaders preach about the lessons of life.
The Catholic Church, started by pagans for pagans, remains a pagan church at its core. Alexander the Great was the true Son of God. Augustus Caesar was the original demigod said to be born a virgin birth ten years before the Nazarene called Jesus, who claimed the same rumor. Pagans practiced blood sacrifice and ate the body of the burnt offering; later called communion by the church. Pre Christian era, babies were sprinkled with holy water on their Name Day, which the Catholic Church later accepted as baptism. Ostara, a pagan name for Mother Nature, was a celebration of resurrection — springtime — which was celebrated with symbols of fertility like rabbits and bird eggs.
It’s time Westermen reconquer the Catholic Church and return it to its rightful Western traditions. We do this by simply showing up: for cultural unity, celebration of tradition, socializing, and study. We help other Church‑goers understand the truth behind the traditions and begin to call Easter Ostara; change Christ’s Mass back to Yule Tide, and most importantly, replace Jewish myth with Western heroes and legends and replace Jewish Saints with Indo‑European gods and heroes.
A wise man acknowledges Nature’s Law is sovereign and the gods as the Forces of Nature. Most importantly, we must correct the one thing that Jesus did to weaken Western Civilization. Western legend and our native gods taught our people that we do not need a savior because no one is coming to save us. Rather, if Westermen are to survive and thrive as a species, we need to re‑learn how to save ourselves.
Summary Judgment
The piece belongs to a familiar genre: the “Christianity stole everything from paganism” argument, popularized in the nineteenth century through Romantic‑nationalist scholarship (most influentially Jacob Grimm’s Deutsche Mythologie, 1835), recycled through Theosophical and esoteric literature, and amplified online in twentieth‑ and twenty‑first‑century forms such as the Zeitgeist film series. The historical claims it advances are, with rare exceptions, either inaccurate, unsupported by primary sources, or stated with a confidence that the surviving evidence cannot bear.
Claim‑by‑Claim Analysis
Claim: “ The Catholic Church, started by pagans for pagans, remains a pagan church at its core .”
Assessment: False. Jesus, all twelve Apostles, Paul, and the authors of every book of the New Testament were Jews. The Church’s scriptures, liturgical structures, and sacramental theology are continuous with Second Temple Judaism. The Church spread into the pagan Mediterranean world, but it did not originate there.
Claim: “ Alexander the Great was the true Son of God. ”
Assessment: A rhetorical assertion rather than a historical claim. Alexander accepted the title “son of Zeus‑Ammon” after the oracle at Siwa in 331 BC, and many Hellenistic rulers afterward claimed divine descent. The word “true” does all the argumentative work in the sentence and is not defended.
Claim: “ Augustus Caesar was the original demigod said to be born a virgin birth ten years before the Nazarene called Jesus. ”
Assessment: Multiple factual errors. Augustus was born in 63 BC; Jesus is conventionally placed around 4–6 BC. The gap is approximately sixty years, not ten. Suetonius (Life of Augustus 94) preserves a story that Augustus’s mother Atia was impregnated by Apollo appearing as a serpent in a temple, but Atia was a married woman with other children. This is a divine‑impregnation legend of a familiar Greco‑Roman type, not a virgin birth. The structures are theologically and narratively distinct. The text also asserts that Jesus “claimed the same rumor” about himself; in fact, the virgin birth appears in the infancy narratives of Matthew and Luke, not in any saying attributed to Jesus.
Claim: “ Pagans practiced blood sacrifice and ate the body of the burnt offering; later called communion by the church. ”
Assessment: Sacrificial meals existed in many ancient cultures, including Greek, Roman, Mesopotamian, and Israelite religion. The Christian Eucharist, however, derives explicitly and textually from the Jewish Passover seder (the Last Supper) and from the Jewish todah and peace‑offering traditions. The institution narratives in the Synoptic Gospels and in 1 Corinthians 11 are framed in Passover terms. A generic resemblance to pagan ritual meals does not establish a line of descent; the documentary trail runs through Judaism.
Claim: “ Babies were sprinkled with holy water on their Name Day, which the Catholic Church later accepted as baptism. ”
Assessment: The Roman dies lustricus, observed on the eighth day for girls and the ninth for boys, was a purification and naming rite. Christian baptism, however, derives from Jewish ritual immersion (mikvah) and the practice of John the Baptist in the Jordan, both well attested before any plausible Roman influence. Early Christian baptism was full immersion of adults; the shift toward infant baptism by affusion or sprinkling developed gradually over several centuries for theological and practical reasons unrelated to Roman naming custom.
Claim: “ Ostara, a pagan name for Mother Nature, was a celebration of resurrection — springtime — with symbols of fertility like rabbits and bird eggs. ”
Assessment: This is the weakest claim in the document. The entire surviving primary source for Eostre is a single short passage in Bede’s De temporum ratione (c. 725 AD), which states only that the Anglo‑Saxons named a month after a goddess by that name. There is no ancient description of her rituals, no association with resurrection, no association with rabbits or eggs, and no identification with “Mother Nature.” Every elaboration beyond Bede’s sentence is a modern reconstruction, beginning with Jacob Grimm in 1835 and continuing through twentieth‑century neo‑pagan literature. The Easter Bunny is first attested in seventeenth‑century Germany. Most European languages do not call Easter “Easter” at all; they use words derived from Hebrew Pesach (Pâques, Pascua, Pasqua, Páscoa). The Eostre–Easter link is largely an English and German linguistic accident.
Claim: “ Change Christ’s Mass back to Yule Tide. ”
Assessment: Yule (Old Norse jól) was a Germanic midwinter feast, and after the Christianization of northern Europe it overlapped with Christmas in vocabulary and custom. But the choice of December 25 in the Roman calendar predates significant Germanic influence on the Roman liturgy and is plausibly the result of theological calculation from March 25 (the traditional date of both the Annunciation and the Crucifixion in early patristic computation), not a takeover of a pre‑existing Yule festival. The popular “Christmas equals stolen Yule or Saturnalia” narrative oversimplifies the historiography.
Claim: “ Replace Jewish Saints with Indo‑European gods and heroes. ”
Assessment: The premise of the proposed swap is empirically wrong. The overwhelming majority of saints venerated in Catholic tradition are not Jewish. Patrick, Brigid, Boniface, Augustine of Hippo, Augustine of Canterbury, Benedict, Thomas Aquinas, Francis of Assisi, Joan of Arc, and the entire Roman martyrology of Roman, Greek, Celtic, and Germanic figures are European. The Jewish saints in the calendar are essentially the apostolic generation and a handful of Old Testament prophets.
Claim: “ Our native gods taught our people that we do not need a saviour because no one is coming to save us. ”
Assessment: False as a generalization about Indo‑European tradition. The returning saviour‑king or eschatological deliverer is in fact a recurrent Indo‑European motif: King Arthur as rex quondam et futurus, Frederick Barbarossa sleeping in the Kyffhäuser awaiting his return, the Kalki avatar in Hindu eschatology, Saoshyant in Zoroastrianism, and the survivors of Ragnarök in Norse cosmology who repopulate a renewed world. The contrast between self‑reliant pagans and dependent Christians is a modern ideological construct that does not survive contact with the actual mythological corpus.
An Internal Contradiction
The argument also contains a contradiction that is independent of any disputed historical fact. The text first asserts that the Catholic Church is already pagan at its core, then calls for it to be “reconquered” for paganism. If the first claim were true, the second would be unnecessary. The two claims cannot both be the operative premise of the program.
Closing Note
Several of the surface observations the text makes are themselves real phenomena: sacrificial meals are a near‑universal feature of ancient religion; Christmas and Easter folk customs in northern Europe absorbed local pre‑Christian material; many Hellenistic rulers were given divine titles. The error lies in inferring from any such resemblance that the later tradition is therefore a disguised version of the earlier one. The documentary chain of the Christian sacraments, the calendar, and the saintly cult runs primarily through Second Temple Judaism and the Greco‑Roman Mediterranean as filtered through the early Church, not through Germanic or Celtic paganism, about which our primary sources are in any case strikingly thin.
This post was originally published on my Substack. Link here
